We are all guilty of creating unrealistic expectations when it comes to our development. We start diets and expect results within the same day. We expect medication to work the instant it is taken and we all expect to be the best at what we do. Expectations are a part of life. You expect things, which is normal. Expectations give us something to strive to, but are they necessarily healthy?
What are ‘expectations’?
Expectations are our wishes, our dreams, our desires. They influence our lives and determine whether or not we are happy with where we are at in life and satisfied with our progress towards achieving certain milestones. They form a part of our lives from a young age but many of us are yet to discover how to set realistic, healthy expectations for ourselves.
As Steve Lynch once said, “Unrealistic expectations are premeditated resentments”. This was said based on the fact that many people believe that by setting a goal, it will magically come true. Unfortunately, this form of wishful thinking generally has the opposite effect as no actual effort is put into reaching the goal and, as such, the goal is not met.
This often leads to a “blame game” effect during which the person looks for someone to blame – or resent. This so-called reason for their failure is then always referred to as soon as things do not go according to plan and becomes the go-to reason for giving up.
So, how can we go about setting healthy expectations for ourselves, and how do life coaches assist us in doing so?
The life coaching process and healthy expectations
Firstly, you need to identify what it is you are looking to achieve. Once this has been identified, you need to break it down further. In other words, what do are you required to achieve in order to reach your goal? Break your main goal or expectation down into smaller steps and create a checklist to refer back to.
We referenced losing weight in the first paragraph, and so we will continue using this example. Your end goal is losing weight, so what other goals form a part in losing weight? Changing your diet, exercising etc…
Your checklist may look something this:
Goal: Lose 10kg by December
- Cut out sugar.
- Drink two litres of water a day.
- Go to the gym twice a week.
- Walk the dogs every morning.
As you begin to check things off of your list, you will feel more optimistic that you are setting out to achieve your goal, as opposed to only having one goal and expecting to reach it in one easy step.
A life coach will assist you in determining your end goal and will assist you to design an action plan that will assist you to achieve it in a healthy, realistic manner. Your life coach will be there at every step of the way providing motivation and insight in order to ensure that you reach your goal.
If you want to get a deeper insight into what it takes to become a life coach, you need to do our Life Coaching Certification. With this certification under your belt you’ll be the life coach that everyone wants to come to! For more information, please follow this link.